I've worked in the field of high conflict divorce for almost 16 years... and yes, it's as toxic as you imagine it might be.
Rather - it's as toxic as your mindset is around it.
I got into high conflict work because I was experiencing my own high conflict relationship and needed - DESPERATELY NEEDED - to *figure it out* and *fix it*.
16 years, 4 kids, 13 dogs, ridiculous amounts of guinea pigs and hamsters later... I've written 1 adult book on how to survive a high conflict divorce (complete with actionable strategies that work - when you use them), 3 kids books on how to help kids feel their feelings so they don't later learn to numb them and have built a successful high conflict communication practice to help others *figure it out* and *fix it*...
And then one day a client asked me to tell him how I found the light at the end of the tunnel when it feels like nothing is around you except darkness. He asked me to help him remember that his current experience with his high conflict ex is not is final experience, that his life was not over.
And he asked me to write a sequel to my adult book "I'm Done: Take Control of Your High Conflict Divorce." So that he and others could hold on to the possibility that after the work of *figuring it out* and *fixing it* is over, he would be a whole person still and not just a shell of himself.
Managing your relationship with the high conflict person in your life will be you hardest experience, hands down.
But it won't be your only experience and you don't have to do it alone.
Find the Good may sound fluffy and simplistic, especially when you are fighting for your sanity and those of your family members, but don't you find that all brilliant insights stem from something simple?
Find the Good will help you simplify the complicated. How do I know this? Because I've built a successful business helping families Find the Good when it appears like there isn't any... Let Find the Good help you.
Andrea LaRochelle, RFM